Saturday, February 23, 2013

Why relationships end

Why relationships end

The real cause of relationship breakup can be avoided so easily if we would only recognize it. Instead many other things are blamed for the breakup but the real cause is seldom dealt with. This is why so many relationship breakups go unsolved. In fact, if you asked a party to the breakup years after it happened they still would not be able to tell you the real reason.


The four reasons usually given for a relationship breakup are:


1. Cheating. One of the partners strayed and the other partner was unable to cope with the situation or forgive the straying partner. No doubt this is a good reason for breaking up but it is not the real cause. The real cause of relationship breakup was probably what was behind the cheating but it wasn't the real cause.


2. Finances. At some time during a relationship, financial problems are bound to arise. Perhaps because of losing a job, overspending or poor management of funds. When things get tight we become worried and irritable. The tendency to snap at each other or place blame occurs. This too can become a serious problem, but it is not the real cause of relationship breakup.


3. <b. Children. Bless their hearts, they can be such a joy and yet such a problem. Many victims of a relationship breakup will blame the inability to agree on the ways to raise them and the time involved in doing so as the reason for the breakup. This too can lead to serious problems for a relationship but it is not the real cause of the breakup.


4. Sex. This can no doubt be a very big contributor to lack of relationship harmony. When one or both of the partners are sexually dissatisfied, discord is bound to arise. It can lead to the cheating and disinterest. But still this can be overcome if the real cause of relationship breakup is avoided.


With the proper steps and the right kind of communication. If that seems a little over simplified, think again. Tell me which of the above relationship problems cannot be overcome or solved by doing and saying the right things at the proper time. You see, we get so swept up in our everyday trials that we do not talk to each other. When we have something about the relationship that does not please us, we keep it to ourselves and let it fester and grow until it becomes overwhelming and then we act.


Any relationship can be saved

Most often the actions we take are destructive instead of constructive and there goes the relationship. The sad part is that learning the right techniques of effective communication may be all that is needed to avoid relationship breakup.

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