Thursday, June 28, 2012

Can exes ever be friends?

Can exes ever be friends?

There's always more to Ex relationships that meets the eye.
"Just friends" hmmm?? Don't be so sure. Enemies? Don't be so sure either. How the ending of your relationship really creates the end.

In today's world, people have mores exes than before. In the past, no one expected exes to be friends. Most people made a clean break. Today though, it's very different. For example, if you look at other people's facebook pages, you will usually see some if not a lot of the exes as facebook friends. In today's society, the person who says they can't be friends with their exes appears to be unsophisticated and insecure.

What these cultural changes do is allow a lot of time spent on exes. The sad truth is that the more time you spend on exes, the less likely it is that you'll look for the right person. It's simply not healthy to spend too much time with your exes.

After the saying "size doesn't matter", the bigest lie of all are exes are "just friends". Call them anything that you want, but once you get naked with them when they are your ex, things change. If you remain "friends with benefits" with them, you are simply creation an illusion in your mind. You cannot free yourself emotionally to find Mr. Right. It is a proven fact that females internally associate physical intimacy with love.

Top signs that you are not "Just Friends".

* You are not "just friends" if you think about him all the time. It doesn't matter if those thoughts are positive or negative.

* You are not "just friends" if he still pushes your buttons.

* You are not "just friends" if you hide your contact with him.

* You are not "just friends" if you flirt even though you say you don't want him.

* You are not "just friends" if you are ragging on his new girlfriend.

* You are not "just friends" if you use his friends to get to him.

* You are not "just friends" if you want to get back together.

* You are not "just friends" if you are not in a new relationship.

* You are not "just friends" if you wont introduce your Ex to your new boyfriend.

* You are not "just friends" if you are still being intimate with your ex.

So there you have it. I am sorry if this list put you on the defensive. Yes, I know that there are exceptions to the signs, but it has been shown that they are few and far between. These are the obvious indicators that you are not "just friends" with your ex.

Think about what "a friend" really is. A friend is a supporter, an ally, someone who's on your team. Does that describe your ex?

If you are claiming to truly be "just friends" with your ex. These following questions should help you to determine whether you see him as just a friend or whether deep down, you really hope you get them back someday.

* Do you call him for no reason?

* Do you try to sabotage his new relationships?

* Do you make up excuses to see him?

* Do you use his family or friends to get to him?

* Do you go to places where you know that you will run into him?

* Do you try to prove something to him by doing nice things?

* Do you compare every new date to him?

* Do you beat yourself up emotionally about how you could have done things differently?

* Do you use him for affection and attention?

* Do you keep him around because you are afraid that you will regret letting him go?

* Do you take advantage of his kindness?

* Do you tease him?

* Do you say and do things that will keep him hooked in?

Answer these questions honestly to yourself!! If you answered yes to any of them, you are not "just friends" yet. Not saying that you never will be but you aren't yet.

For more reading and video on how to get the relationship that you truly want and figuring out exactly what type of relationship that is, check out my site at

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