How to set up boundaries in relationships and stay friendsAuthor: Marvin Mitchell
How do you define a Relationship? Whether family, friends, acquaintances, professional or personal there are certain levels of allowable information and conversation that can (or not) be communicated.
Relationships are important because we all have a need for social interaction as well as connecting with others to release our inner most secrets, fears, goals and desires.
Think of a relationship as a two-person voyage to an exotic island. The important thing is that you want to share the same [ship], leave on the same date and time. Since you both are on the same ship then you have to be going in the same direction. Relationship or friendship you have to be going in the same direction, if not there is no value in spending time together.
There are those that thrive on knowing as many people as they can, but never develop a solid relationship. These kinds of people are those that want to know, maintain, and promote gossip, aka other people's affairs such as business, personal or private. These type of people have personal issues that may need professional help, or just in need of a personal relationship with their creator.
Enough about negative people you just have to ignore or avoid them.
Relationships are to be developed and celebrated, coupled with the most important ingredient is unconditional love. Love does not fear. Love is kind and always seeks the best in relationships. Love is neither critical nor judgmental of a person but looks at the actions of a person and assists in helping others make positive adjustment s.
One method that you can use to keep balance in your relationship(s) is to keep in mind how we were formed as in spirit, soul, and body. Each the average person can identify with inner personalilities and are in use daily: professionally, personally, and privately. One, your professional personality should be used when you are in a work related environment, communicating and relationships.
Second, your personal personality should be used when you are communicating with those in which you have a relationship (known for a few years) that you will be able to share limited personal information. Those people that you may speak with on a weekly basis for general conversations.
Third, private personality (limited) you should only share with someone that you have known over an extended period of years (unique relationship can happen in a shorter period) that has a proven record of being a confidant, reliable, not selfish or a gossiper, and loves you unconditionally. If you have more than three people in this area you may have challenges with trust and private information in which at least one or two of them will share with someone else outside your circle.
Finally, you define any relationship by setting up balance and boundaries to guide, guard, and govern your life and allow you to enjoy and maximize every moment. I believe that you can only have true peace, joy, an abundance through a personal relationship with God, the only one that know the real you.