5 Reasons Why Some Relationships Need to EndAuthor: Bellaisa Filippis
Not all relationships are going to stay strong and last forever. This is not a bad thing though. It just means that you have taken a chance on someone and when the relationship ends you have learned something new about what you don't want in a partner. Essentially, it makes looking for the perfect partner even easier because you have a new knowledge of what you want.
But ending a bad relationship is easier said than done. Even if you are aware that your relationship is unhealthy and that it needs to end it can still be hard to chop the ties between you two.
So if you realize that your relationship is unhealthy and that it needs to end but you are having a hard time convincing yourself of that fact, then here are 5 reasons that will help you really understand why breaking up will be the best thing you ever did.
1. Your Relationship May Be Making You Sick
If your relationship is not in a healthy and in a happy state then you are probably experiencing many negative emotions on daily basis. Too much complaining, hopelessness, lack of control, and other negative feelings can cause a huge amount of stress on the body.
Stress can cause a host of problems both physically and mentally. Just to name a few:
- You can gain weight.
- You can put your heart at risk for heart disease and stroke.
- You can cause gastrointestinal disorders such as irritable bowel syndrome and painful ulcers.
- You can become depressed.
- You can start to develop memory problems.
- Your immune system can start to weaken resulting in more colds
- You can develop anxiety
- You can start to make bad decisions with your health (ie. Drugs, alcohol, or overeating)
The list goes on and on. But if you are experiencing an unhealthy relationship and you value your health you will either fix the relationship or end the relationship if fixing it is not possible.
2. You're Wasting Precious Time on an Unhealthy Relationship
This life is only so many minutes long. You use the minutes the way you see fit, but you don't get those minutes back.
Knowing that simple truth would you rather use your life's minutes feeling unhappy and unfulfilled or would you rather get busy enjoying life and making the most out of it? I'm willing to bet that you would rather use your minutes well.
Think of it this way, when you are about to die and you look back on your life's journey, will you feel good about how you used your time or will you feel bad? If you answer that you will feel bad or that you are not sure then you may want to start paying attention to what really makes you happy and start getting the most bang for your buck in your minutes left.
An unhappy relationship is not worth your minutes. End the relationship and find a better way to spend your precious time.
3. It's Affecting Your Other Relationships
Being moody or negative because of your relationship will drizzle into every area of your life, including your family, friend, and work relationships. You will literally affect your relationships in a negative way and you may start to become disliked because of it. You can lose friends, gain enemies, lose promotions, and alienate family with your behaviour.
I personally have a relative who is in a very negative relationship. To put it bluntly her husband is a lazy jerk. She stays in the relationship even though she is unhappy and she grows more miserable every day. Her friends, who supported her throughout the relationship, have slowly drifted out of her life because of her negative attitude. She has alienated her brother who used to be her best friend. She has literally become a pathetic lump of the beautiful energy she used to be. From an outside point of view we all know that she needs to end this toxic relationship, but she has succumbed to depression and the thought that she deserves no better than this jerk has taken place in her head.
Do not let yourself get to her state! Accept the relationship for what it is and take responsibility for your own health and other relationships outside of the unhealthy relationship. If you have to get out then get out.
4. Your Relationship Is Holding You Back
If you spend all your time worrying about your relationship and dealing with the issues that arise from it then you may barely have enough energy to get out and do the things you love or want to do.
Your energy is precious just like your time. More energy is required to deal with negative issues and people than is to deal with positive issues and people. You only have to get into an argument to realize this. You probably feel drained and like giving up after an argument with no more energy to go on. This is holding you back from doing something more productive.
In a healthy relationship, or even when you are single, you have the energy to grow as a person in every way imaginable. You don't have to waste your energy on negative feelings but rather gain energy from your positive relationships that allow you to go out and do what you want to do.
Bottom line: If you want personal growth in life you have to be able to have the energy to put into that growth. If you ware wasting all of your time on negative feelings and thoughts then you are not allowing yourself to move forward with your life.
5. You Are Going in Circles in the Relationship
Sometimes you can do everything in your power to fix the relationship with no improvement. You try something new, it works for a while, and then you end up right back at the issue that you first started at. If you find yourself doing this a lot then you may want to end your relationship.
Spending the next 5 or even 50 years trying to ‘make it better' will be a waste of time chasing your tail. That is so pointless. That is so frustrating!
If you find that nothing has worked and you feel as though you have tried everything you can then don't keep trying something that isn't working. Stop going in circles. Chances of the relationship improving is slim at this point and the only way out of the circle is to jump ship and start heading in a straight line somewhere else.
Bellaisa is the owner of the Relationship Circle, a website with relationship advice for men and women on dating, intimacy, and other issues. Check it out and start fixing your relationship problems today for a happier tomorrow.